Dear friends,

The IHOP-KC family is grieving the loss of Derek Loux. He and his wife had two natural children, adopted eight, and were working to establish a center for thousands of orphans. The Loux family has been tragically left without a father and husband this Christmas. Please read the following messages sent to the IHOP-KC family and posted on FaceBook. Thank you for remembering them in your prayers!

Chérie Blair

P.S. Please share this with others who would want to know. Thanks!
_____________________________________

A Real Life Hero

Yesterday morning the world lost real life hero when Derek Loux, father of 10, loving husband, brother, son and friend was tragically killed in a car accident.

Please pray for the family as we walk through this devastating tragedy. We thank you for all your prayers and support, it means more than you know.

The family is asking that in lieu of flowers, donations would be made to the Josiah Fund.

http://www.facebook.com/l/48186;www.josiahfund.org/

Blessings to all of you.

From: IHOP Staff Message <ihopstaffmessage@ihop.org>
Date: Wed, 23 Dec 2009 14:53:50 -0600
To: ihopfamily <ihopfamily@ihop.org>
Subject: Please pray for the family of Derek Loux

Dear IHOP–KC family,

Derek Loux, who has been such an important part of our IHOP–KC family for many years, is now in the presence of his Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. Early this morning as he was traveling home from Colorado, Derek was killed in an automobile accident when his car hit a patch of black ice. Derek had been in Colorado to receive more extensive training in how to minister to victims of human trafficking,

For years, this precious man of God has faithfully served his Lord and our missions base in so many areas, including helping pioneer the Forerunner Music Academy where he served as director. Derek was part of the IHOP-KC senior leadership team, a worship leader in the house of prayer, and a frequent IHOP–KC conference speaker. He has recorded professionally as a musician, singer, and songwriter, including his albums Paper Religion and Fragrant Burning.  Before joining IHOP–KC he served as the director of IHOP-Indianapolis for four years.

Derek’s life passion was adopting and restoring orphans; he pioneered the vision of the Orphan Justice Center—a haven of restoration for rescued orphans. OJC recently become an official part of IHOP–KC. His tireless voice for the weak and voiceless indelibly marked us all. How we will miss him.

Renee and the children will need so very much love and support, not only in these first weeks, but for many years. In the immediate, Pamela Stead will spearhead all practical care for the family. Please contact her (pamelastead@ihop.org) if you would like to be involved in practical helps. We ask you to please give the Loux family (immediate and extended) privacy to grieve, and only go to the home if invited. There will be many ways to give—meals, childcare, home care, finances. More details will follow soon on how you can give to this precious family. We will also let you know the memorial plans.

We do not grieve as those who have no hope, but oh how we grieve. For Renee, for children who have lost their earthly father, and for our family who has lost a marvelous comrade. Until that Day when He dries every tear . . . we mourn with the Loux family.

The IHOP–KC Leadership Team

Click on this photo of the entire Loux family to view a larger image. Read more on their blog: http://louxfamilyblog.com/

On the night before Christmas every girl and boy is tucked into bed eagerly anticipating the coming of a man clothed in red and white. Some will sneak out of bed to catch a glimpse. Many newscasts even have a “Santa Watch” charting his course across the sky.

We are watching. Why? We believe in Santa Claus.

There is another Man clothed in red and white. He is described as white and ruddy (Song 5:10). We celebrate His birth on this day called Christmas. He came first as a humble Child, but He will come again as a mighty King wearing a robe dipped in blood. His name is the Word of God (Rev 19:13). Are we watching for His procession from heaven to earth? Soon Jesus will split the sky with His return, not on a sleigh led by reindeer, but on the clouds of heaven surrounded by a host of angels (Matt. 26:64; 16:27).

It’s true, He has a list and He’s checking it twice, and He’s going to find out whose name is written in the Lamb’s Book of Life. When He evaluates your life will He find you’ve been naughty or nice? The Father has treasures in store for His children. His Son will come bearing these gifts. “For the Son of Man will come in the glory of His Father with His angels, and then He will reward each according to his works” (Matt. 16:27). When Jesus returns He will judge the earth. Those who despise the Word of God will be destroyed, but the righteous will be rewarded (Prov. 13:13; Psalm 58:11). For this reason He says, “Behold, I am coming as a thief. Blessed is he who watches” (Rev. 16:15). Are we eagerly anticipating His coming?

Let us watch. Why? We believe in Jesus Christ.

“And behold, I am coming quickly, and My reward is with Me, to give to every one according to his work.” – Revelation 22:12

Merry CHRISTmas!

Chérie Blair

To view original message with header and links: click here

GOD TV pays tribute to Oral Roberts (1918-2009)

GOD TV will be breaking with its regular schedule on Monday December 21st to broadcast Oral Roberts’ Memorial Service worldwide.

Aired LIVE from Tulsa, Oklaholma at 3pm (EST) /8pm (GMT) the service will take place in the 11,000-seater Mabee Center in the grounds of Oral Roberts University, the world-class educational institution he founded.

The veteran healing evangelist passed away on December 15 at the age of 91 and will be remembered for restoring many key truths to the Body of Christ over several decades of ministry.

“Oral Roberts was one of God’s generals and leaves a vast legacy,” said GOD TV founder’s Rory and Wendy Alec. “He was a great man of faith and always exhorted believers to ‘Expect a miracle!’

“The Lord also used Oral Roberts to pioneer Christian Television and we continue to be inspired by him as GOD TV breaks new ground for the Gospel around the world, through media.”

Watch online at www.god.tv.

Visit the Oral Roberts’ Memorial Website at: www.orm.cc/oralroberts/

Dear IHOP Family,

The 700 Club did a short report on the Student Awakening.  This is a precise and helpful overview of what is happening here.  We encourage you to forward this email to your friends and family so that they may also pass it on to others, and many can join us live by webstream at www.ihop.org.

Blessings,
The IHOP-KC Leadership Team

The 700 Club (Christian Broadcasting Network) just ran this story on the IHOP Awakening on national TV today. Please pass this on to others:

http://www.cbn.com/cbnnews/us/2009/December/Awakening-Sweeps-over-Intl-House-of-Prayer-/

Monday Prayer and Fasting December 21, 2009

Dear Pray-ers and Fast-ers,

This is the weekly email reminder that we are fasting and praying today for God to bring healing and redemption in places where we are stuck and broken;  give the gift of marriage to those of us that desire it; and work redemption and strength in men so that they can (and do!) pursue and commit to a woman.

I’ve been one of the many recipients of the east-coast blizzard, and I have to say it’s been rather nice to be cooped up at home, unable to get out.  And the snow is gorgeous. Despite the beauty outside and all the happy holiday tv shows and commercials, holidays can be such a painful time… for me it has been the painful yearly “mark” I’ve used to tick off one more year that my life has not changed in the way I want it to change. I’ve often struggled at Christmas to believe that God is good to me. I’ve known it in my head, but my emotions have often had a hard time catching up.  And although God has bruoght a wonderful man this year, life is not pain free, nor is everything the way I want it to be–in some arenas of my life, not even close! Pain has abounded even more.  I still struggle to trust that God can and will show up with his goodness.  The devotion I read this morning from a little devotional book by World Harvest Mission called My Luggage is Not Heavy spoke to this, so I wanted to share it with you. This was written by Patric Knaak. I hope you find it encouraging.

My most persistent “hard questions” have to do with God’s goodness. I don’t really have a hard time believing that God is all powerful or all knowing. And, on a theoretical level, I don’t doubt that God is good.

But where I do wrestle, often in direct relationship to the circumstances of my life, is with questions like, “Is God really willing to be good to me, here, today, in the midst of my unbelief? Does God really, truly love me? And if he does, why isn’t he doing something to make things better?

Early on in his ministry, Jesus ran into a man who was asking the same sort of questions. The story is told in Mark 1:

A man with leprosy came to him and begged him on his knees, “If you are willing, you can make me clean.” Filled with compassion, Jesus reached out his hand and touched the man. “I am willing,” he said. “Be clean!” Immediately the leprosy left him and he was cured.  Jesus sent him away at once with a strong warning: “See to it that you don’t tell this to anyone. But go, show yourself to the priest and offer the sacrifices that Moses commanded for your cleansing, as a testimony to them.” Instead he went out and began to talk freely, spreading the news. As a result, Jesus could no longer enter a town openly but stayed outside in lonely places.

Did you catch what the man said? “If”–”If you are willing, you can make me clean.” Just like me, the leper isn’t questioning Jesus’ abilities. He’s wondering about Jesus’ goodness.

Its an understandable question given what the leper was going through.  He was dying from a painful, disfiguring disease. And because of the OT laws on cleanness, he was forced to live apart from his family and friends and barred from worshipping at the temple. The leper’s physical disease is a tangible illustration of what sin does in our lives. Sin causes physical suffering and eventual death, isolates us from those we love, and ultimately separates us from God.

Jesus’ response is no less revealing than the leper’s question. As Jesus looks down on this wreck of a human, he sees someone who has been so crushed by his circumstances that he is unsure if his heavenly Father even loves him anymore. Mark’s particular choice of works in the original text tells us that Jesus “fills up to overflowing with compassion” for the leper. What could be more awesome than looking up into the eyes of the Alpha and Omega, the Firstborn Over All Creation, and seeing pure, unadulterated compassion and tenderness?

Then, Jesus reaches out his hand and firmly puts it on the man. (And when do you suppose was the last time someone did that?)  A second or two goes by, and Jesus removes all doubt about his desire to heal the man, saying “I am willing. Be clean!”

At those words, this shell of a human, this dead man walking among the living, is brought back to health, life, and peace with God. And with that new life, the leper literally “began to preach a lot in order to tell others about what Jesus had done for him. He is a new man with a new story to tell.

Even here, thought, my own leprous heart is tempted to complain: “Yes, but he got what he wanted, didn’t he? He was healed and restored. But Jesus hasn’t really fixed the issues in my life that need fixing and until he does, I’m having a hard time trusting him.” And so I need people around me who will lovingly challenge me and point me back to the truth of the gospel: God’s lavish goodness had already been poured out on me through Christ’s death on the cross.

In the larger context of Mark’s Gospel, we see that before meeting the leper, Jesus was free to travel where he wanted, spreading the good news of hte kingdom, while the leper was isolated and unable to move freely. At the end of his encounter with Jesus, it is now the leper who is surrounded by people and preaching about Jesus, while Jesus is confined to the lonely places.

Mark is subtly pointing us ahead to the great exchange that takes place on the cross: our healing is dependent on Christ’s affliction.  In a very real sense, Jesus is saying to us, “I am willing,” because the ultimate statement of “I am willing” has already come in the form of “It is finished.”

Powerful, huh?

We’re going to take a break from prayer and fasting for the next 2 weeks, then we’ll be back at it January 10th.

May God’s grace be to you over the holidays, and may you truly believe and trust his goodness.

Anne

To receive weekly updates please e-mail fast.pray@gmail.com.

As we approach the time our culture celebrates the birth of Jesus I am reminded of many who did not recognize the hour of the Lord’s first coming (Luke 19:44).

I recall another occasion when the multitudes did not head the Word of the Lord. In Noah’s day God warned of a coming flood. As Noah labored for a hundred years building a boat to protect all those who would enter from the coming storm, the people laughed. I can imagine them saying, “Noah, you’re wasting your time! Where is this rain of yours?” Even those who did not outwardly mock did so by the way they lived, going about life as usual, oblivious of the impending doom.

Jesus said, “As it was in the days of Noah, so it will be with the coming of the Son of Man” (Matthew 24:36-39). Many scoffers will arise in that day saying, “Where is the promise of His coming?” (2 Peter 3:3-4). Just as it was in the days of Noah they will say, “Where is this so called Reign?” Some will openly scorn and ridicule those who prepare for the Lord’s return; others will do so by their actions. They will eat, drink, and be merry, mindful of earthly circumstances but asleep to urgency of the hour.

Elijah also prophesied the sound of heavy rain. He told his servant to look toward the sea, but six times he went and came back saying, “There is nothing.” The seventh time he reported a cloud as small as a man’s hand rising from the sea. Soon the sky grew black with clouds, the wind stirred, and heavy rain came (1 King 18:41-45).

Beloved, Jesus’ Reign is coming! Lift up your eyes. He is returning soon. Storm clouds are gathering on the horizon. For a long while we could not see them, and even now they may only seem like the size of a man’s hand, but the sky will grow black quickly. Jesus told us to discern the signs of the times (Matthew 16:3). He tells us to watch and pray, to stand in the counsel of the Lord, to mark and perceive His words. We must not to be like the foolish virgins but like the wise and buy oil now while our Bridegroom is delayed. Only those who are ready will go in with Him to the wedding. If we wait until we hear His call it will be too late. Therefore, since we do not know when Jesus is returning, He tells us to watch (Matthew 25:1-13).

The Lord told Isaiah to prophecy. He asked, “What shall I cry?” The Lord replied, “All flesh is grass, and all its loveliness is like the flower of the field. The grass withers, the flower fades, because the breath of the LORD blows upon it … The grass withers, the flower fades, but the word of our God stands forever” (Isaiah 40:6-8). God’s word is true. Jesus is coming. Are we ready? Are we spending our time on things of eternal purpose or things that fade away like the flowers of the field?

Beloved, when the Son of Man returns will He find faith in our hearts? Do we believe He is coming again? What are we doing to prepare the way for His return? I don’t want to be like those who did not recognize His first coming. I don’t want to be like those who fall asleep. I don’t want to walk according to my own ways. I don’t want to waste my time. This life only lasts a moment. It is but a vapor. I don’t want to waste it. I want to watch and pray with Him. I believe He is coming to shake the heavens and the earth. I need His grace to watch and pray. I want to be a voice. I want to be a messenger. I want to be a voice preparing the way of the Lord. I believe that He is coming again. I don’t want to be like the scoffers. I want to hasten the day of His coming. I want to be found with oil in my lamp. I want to be found watching and waiting, ready to go out to meet our Bridegroom. I don’t want to waste my time as I wait here in this wilderness. I want to be a voice like John the Baptist crying out, “Prepare the way of the Lord!”

Let us not sleep. Let us be sober. Let us be watchful and alert. The day of the Lord is at hand. He will come just as He promised. When the Son of Man returns, let us be found watching, eagerly awaiting His appearing. Surely He will come like a thief, taking many by surprise. Let us be wise and prepare the way of the Lord.

Beware of the scoffing spirit. It comes upon us subtly. We may not laugh out loud, but in our hearts we do not believe. We do not recognize the signs. We squander our time. So many hours wasted. What vanity! So much time spent on things that have no eternal significance. Who will be found wise and faithful on that day? Watch therefore and be ready for the Lord is coming at an hour we do not expect (Matthew 24:42-45).

Do you believe He is coming? What are you doing to prepare the way for His return?

Chérie Blair

Do you ever feel like a little pawn on a giant chessboard in this game of life?

The good news is that God is the ultimate Chess King! He knows how to play on multiple dimensions simultaneously at least a thousand moves ahead. His divine strategy causes us to move our pieces into the right spaces at the right time to accomplish His purposes without violating our free will. Of course we must submit to play according to His rules in order for everything to work out in our favor!

And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose. – Romans 8:28 NKJV

I had just been writing about this chess revelation and thanking the Lord for the way He strategically orchestrates every detail of our lives when I was suddenly faced with a potentially frustrating situation. My tire was flat! Monday was coming to a close and I still had an evening meeting to attend but I was stranded at work. Believe it or not, my response reflected my earlier meditation. I remained completely unshaken as I evaluated my options:

1. Call AAA (and wait 45 min for help to arrive)
2. Do it myself

I had never actually changed a flat tire by myself, but I had helped (or rather watched) someone else change one before. I considered the fact that I would be participating in a disaster simulation with CRI (Crisis Response International) at the end of the week and thought, “If I can’t change a flat tire, how can I respond to a real crisis?” Since I was in a parking lot rather than the side of a freeway and wearing pants with comfortable shoes instead of a skirt and high heels, I said to the Lord, “Let’s change this tire together. Show me how!” I got the jack properly placed but my vehicle did not come equipped with a suitable tool to turn the crank. I was also having trouble unlocking the spare from the back of my KIA … sooooo, I asked a gentleman getting into his car just to help me figure out the lock on the spare tire.

Long story short, the guy stayed to help, we changed the flat, and I got a lead for some possible graphic design work. I then drove to Sam’s Club, got my flat repaired along with all my tires rotated and balanced for free, and was able to encourage a friend not to look at any circumstance as inconvenient. While waiting I read some of Joyce Meyer’s book “Battlefield of the Mind”. The subheading posed a question, “Trial or Inconvenience?” Fortunately, I managed to keep the right perspective. The whole affair only put me an hour behind schedule and I still made it to my meeting on time. Not to mention I had the opportunity to “work with the Holy Spirit” as Joyce described. Well, I’m glad I passed this test of patient endurance.

My response to a situation the previous week was not so glorious. I was just going along adoring the Lord when all of a sudden it hit like a nuclear bomb dropped by an enemy aircraft flying under radar … DESPAIR … that wicked foe of my soul! I was just rising up from the rubble of a previous explosion when I came crashing down again, this time because a potential prospect graciously informed me he was “not interested.” I barely knew what hit me. Wow! Entering the Promise Land requires victory on multiple fronts in numerous battles with heavy opposition. But though a righteous woman falls seven times she gets back up. So moving right along, I picked myself up out of that ash heap of despair by focusing my thoughts once again on adoring God. That’s when I began to see Him as the Divine Chess Champion.

God is intricately involved in every detail of our lives. There is no such thing as coincidence. I am trusting in His perfect leadership to guide me into the right position at the right time with the right people to fulfill His Kingdom purposes. I will not lose heart because I believe I will see the Lord’s goodness.

I would have lost heart, unless I had believed that I would see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living. – Psalm 27:13 NKJV

I am confident that Jesus will get this little “pawn” across the chess board of life and turn me into a beautiful queen. After all, our Beloved is the King of all kings!

– Chérie Blair

Dear Friends,

This has been a year of rest and reshaping priorities. I finally came to the end of my SELF, so I hope. I am nowhere near attaining the prize of life as Paul described but I am pressing on. In January I joined a worship team at the International House of Prayer (www.ihop.org), a goal I had been reaching for since I moved to Kansas City in 2003. Two months later I was cut from the team and received word that my grandmother (Theora Blair) had passed away. I hit a wall. With my world turned upside down I began evaluating my priorities, purpose, and life pursuits. I determined that since I so value the godly heritage my grandparents left to 5 children, 15 grandchildren, and 20 great grandchildren it was time for me to redirect my focus to my husband and children, which leads to the obvious obstacle: I don’t have any … I am still single.

The Lord has graciously given me numerous godly brothers to encourage my heart but He has also brought me to a place of letting go. I thought I had already surrendered all my dreams to the Lord, but I had been struggling to loose my grasp on one last temporal desire: marriage. I am not the only one. Many of my single friends over the age of 30 or 40 are still longing for earthly spouses. The journey of being single but not called to celibacy is a difficult road. After pursuing a long-term relationship I read Josh Harris’ book and “Kissed Dating Goodbye” for an entire decade. For a while I focused entirely on pursuing the Lord. Eventually, my roommate, Audra, and I began praying daily for our future husbands and joined a network of ladies who are praying and fasting for godly marriages to come forth in our generation (to join e-mail: fast.pray@gmail.com). I believe God’s plan is for me to be married and have a family, but I am letting go like Abraham and laying this promise on the altar reasoning that the Lord can resurrect it. I have wrestled with God like Jacob, sought His face like David, cried out like Hannah, and concluded like Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-Nego, that my God is able, He will, and even if He does not fulfill His promise I will not bow down to any earthly idol. My primary pursuit in life will always be to know and love my eternal Bridegroom, Jesus Christ.

We all reach for something: money, success, fulfillment, recognition, relationships, health, comfort, whatever, but loving God fully is the only prize worth winning. We contend for breakthrough in many areas but we gain nothing without love (1 Cor. 13:1-3). Even if we never see a change in our temporary circumstances are we willing to become so consumed with the ultimate prize of loving Jesus that this is all that really matters?

At some point in life the Lord brings each of us to the end of ourselves. For some it takes a major crisis to shift our priorities. Whatever the season you are in I pray the Lord will set His seal of love upon your heart so that you may press on for the prize of loving Him with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength. I am still involved in ministry and working part time. To read more and make contributions visit UniqueDove.com.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

Chérie Blair

Hi Friends,

Well, we’re right in the middle of cookie, icing, brunch, heavy hors d’oeuvres, eggnog, & mulled cider season.  So the discipline of fasting, though radical in December, might just serve as an intelligent means of weight management!  But, that is not why we fast.

We fast as a reminder to ourselves that we are dependent on God and that our appetites are not our gods, and we fast because God’s Word often equates the most powerful prayer as that which is accompanied by fasting.  And as we pray, we are praying, together–across this country and in many other countries as well–for spouses for those who long to be married, for men to walk upright into the lives & relationships that God has designed them for, and for women to be willing to see how we need to change or grow for the sake of good, life-giving relationships/marriages.

So as we pray and fast, I want to share one thought which has been on my mind (which might not seem initially related to marriage and relationships–but hang with me!).  Late this afternoon, my friends, Bob and Ronda, and I went to take a gift to a client we know from the food bank where we volunteer.  He lives alone in a subsidized apt, with one bedroom, one sofa, and one tv.  The only decoration are 3 pictures propped against the wall’s edge:  one of Jesus, one of his deceased father, and one of his daughter, whom he has not seen since she was 10 (probably 20+ years ago).  As we stood there and prayed with him at the end of our visit–and it was truly a sweet time, the 4 of us holding hands, his stained through years of chain smoking and shaking for unknown reasons–I was struck by his the nature of his poverty.  It is most painfully emotional in nature.  He is profoundly alone.  He has some family in the area, but he’s not sure what, if anything, will end up happening for Christmas.  And I pondered as we prayed:  this man needs to be woven into a circle, a family, a community.

I don’t have too many illusions about rescuing people from dire circumstances.  My few years of urban ministry taught me my limits in those arenas.  But nevertheless, I do long to see people woven into circles beyond themselves.  The most natural starting place for single people seems to be marriage and, hopefully, family.  And this belief is integral to why we pray.  And yet, this alone isn’t the end game.  It seems like our souls cry out to be a part of an even bigger family.  Our trinitarian God (who exists in a 3 person community of sorts) has made us like him–people designed to belong, to be woven in, to be part of something far greater and bigger and richer and more alive than ourselves.  It’s as if it is written into our DNA.

This, then, is what we are ultimately praying for.  Ephesians 2:22 speaks of God’s people as “being built together to become a dwelling in which God lives by his Spirit.”  We want to be men and women who are capable of deep, mutual, life-giving, fruitful relationship.  We want to see all of us, men & women alike, increasingly able to love, to be others-centered, to give, and somehow to trust in the process that God will dwell with, among and even through us (and if this happens, you know a side benefit will be more marriages!).

So this Monday, I hope you’ll pray for marriages and for men & women to walk uprightly, AND I hope that you’ll also pray that Spirit-given love among and between us will trump loneliness in our cutlure.   Really, in the end, maybe all this prayer/fast stuff is this simple:  God said it’s not good for man to be alone.  And so, Lord God, we are saying, “We agree!  Bring on loneliness-trumping relationships in the lives of single people, as well as in the lives of married people, in our churches, in our communities.”  I think that prayer is right in line with the heart of God.

Blessings on you as you pray and fast with almost 400 others of us–

Connally

If you would like to receive weekly updates please e-mail pray.fast@gmail.com.

Dear Fast-ers & Pray-ers,

Happy 1st Sunday of Advent (a season of longing for that which has not yet fully arrived, which fits a bit of our general theme, eh? )!

Well, this is your weekly reminder that we are fasting and praying today for men to have the courage to walk upright before God into relationship, for women to have the courage to see any areas we need to change in order to do the same, and for marriages to come to healthy fruition as a result.

And as we pray leading up to Christmas, Heidi, Anne & I thought it might be valuable to hear some additional voices in the mix.  So below are words from a much-admired-by-me-and-others friend, Paula Rinehart.  She’s a wife, mother, grandmother, therapist and author (among her many books are Strong Women, Soft Hearts; Sex & the Soul of a Woman; Better Than My Dreams; and most recently, What’s He Really Thinking?).  All those accomplishments not withstanding, what I appreciate most about her is that she “gets it.”  When I met her 9-10 years ago, she was the first boomer-age married woman I’d met who seemed to get that the rules had changed, that the relational landscape had shifted, and that it wasn’t “your mother’s dating scene” anymore (now this seems to be more commonplace knowledge).  Anyhow, she “got” this without coming up with pat or simple solutions, but while also holding on to a profound belief in the goodness of God to work within and beyond the chaos for the well-being of his people.  In other words, she got how complex the whole relationship thing had/has become AND how good God can be and even is in the midst of the complexity!

So, I’d commend her words to you.  I’d also commend her books while I’m at it (particularly this most recent one–What’s He Really Thinking?–it has some great thoughts on how to pray for men, as well as a uniquely-voiced and very helpful explanation about what goes on in the male mind).  In any case, here are a few words from her to ponder as you pray this Monday….

——-

Just yesterday, I had a conversation with yet another lovely, accomplished woman who wants to be married—and isn’t.  A woman willing to remain single rather than marry a guy who has no relationship with God.  Only she’s 42, with no prospects in sight, and this guy at work with nary a spiritual impulse thinks she’s incredible.  This hot guy at work tells her she is beautiful.  And she is.

So another Monday rolls around and we pray.  We pray because there are hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of women like my friend.  And there are men…who would become even more of a man, if they exercised the courage to trust God and pursue a woman and marry her.

When I wrote What’s He Really Thinking?,  I realized a bit more why marriage poses a hurdle to men now that men in earlier generations considered far more do-able.  Simply put,  there’s a dearth of shaping male influences—and a plethora of opportunities to behave badly, which is bad in and of itself except those things also leave men stunted, immature and turned in on themselves.

I came to the quiet conclusion that it’s harder to be a man.  Lots of supremely female experiences  (like pregnancy, childbirth,  caring actively & empathetically for others) pull a woman along a trail of giving of the best of her self. 

But a man usually has to engage with God to have steady access to the sacrificial greatness he is capable of. 

That’s why an earlier generation sang a hymn that I find myself praying nearly every Monday.

                  Rise up, O men of God,  have done with lesser things,

                  Give heart and mind and soul and voice to serve the

                                    King of Kings.

I so wanted to say to my friend with the hot, non-Christian guy breathing down her neck,  “Honey,  this mess is not your fault.  It’s not you. Not you. Not you.”   It’s the fall-out of a culture that’s gone off the rail.

But what I really wanted to do was give her Connally’s email—and invite her to pray.  I can’t think of prayers more in line with the heart of God than praying for the men of this generation.

I am in it with you,

Paula.